"If it doesn't feel a little bit like dying, it might not be the gospel."

We're going through the book of John in the BJDW community using @melissaspoelstra's guide, and this morning as I was reading something she had written made me pause.

"If it doesn't feel a little bit like dying, it might not be the gospel."

Dying to ourselves.
Being molded.
Being refined.
None of it feels particularly good.

For me, I can see that a big part of being refined - if not the beginning of that journey- was ditching alcohol.

It felt hard. It was going against worldly messaging; booze is the elixir of life. That the liquid itself offers joy, peace, and connection.

It wasn't until I went through the death of my life as a drinker that I realized true peace, joy, and connection, along with hope and purpose (and so much more)- came as a result of that hard-fought battle.

Why am I telling you this?

Because I want you to know that I know it's hard. I want you to know that the refinement process is hard. That the clay being molded by the potter doesn't enjoy being shaped all the time. (Isa. 64.8)

BUT my beautiful friend. On the other side of this struggle with alcohol can be a peace that literally surpasses understanding.

For me, it has been the gateway to further refining, but with the knowledge that it is for a good purpose.

Melissa writes, "gospel purposes are not accomplished by loving this life," and I would add alcohol to that.

I don't know where you are on your faith journey or your alcohol journey, but I want you to know that you are not alone and that even when this feels heavy and hard, I am in your corner- and so much more importantly, Jesus is in your corner.

My DMs are open if you'd like to chat.